Some of my friends and colleagues know that I am a newly avid rider. I instantly fell in love with the sport. I sensed that it had a lot to teach me and that it would become a part of my life and my work.
Equestrianism is an incredibly difficult sport (for me, at least!). It is a partnership between the rider and the horse, it requires intense focus and a degree of coordination I have yet to master. Above all, it is a sport of “mind over matter.” As any rider knows, there are good days and bad days – sometimes it’s you, sometimes it’s the horse, and sometimes it’s both! As difficult as riding is for me, overcoming those difficulties is what makes this sport so appealing. It’s why I eventually became a horse owner and made a commitment to ride almost every day. There is a lot of joy in learning something new, whether it is a sport, a hobby, or even our own craft. And it can be a years-long investment and an important lesson in resilience.
Learning to ride reminds me of when I was learning to be a lawyer. There were great days and difficult days, and I eventually started feeling competent and helpful to colleagues and clients. Later still, I enjoyed the process of attaining mastery, refining a brief or an argument over and over, and teaching others the same. I learned to enjoy the process and to be patient with myself. And learning to enjoy lawyering had a lot do with the people I was lucky enough to work with.
As a young lawyer, I was joining a profession built around an apprenticeship model of learning. While I often got thrown into the deep end, I was also expected to learn by doing, under the supervision and responsibility of one or more senior lawyers. Now, as a rider, I work with trainers who guides me through exercises and lessons in horsemanship. As I improve at the sport, I am also expected to be a leader for my horse. It is my responsibility to clearly and frequently communicate with him and to guide him through our work together, and to understand his own needs and requests inside and outside the ring.
Learning to ride has given me, among many gifts, the ability to see and understand the importance of leadership with fresh eyes. Riding has brought home how important it is for leaders to understand some basic leadership and coaching skills when working with colleagues. I offer an overview of these skills here for new leaders or for leaders seeking to enhance their approach with their colleagues and teams.
Leader as Coach
Coaching is the skill of developing a person’s resourcefulness through a process of questioning, challenging, and supporting. Leaders who take on a coaching role for their more junior colleagues think of their “coachee” as intelligent and competent, and the leader-coach’s role is to help that coachee excel and move beyond their level of comfort to reach new levels of performance. Leaders looking to develop their colleague’s ability and confidence typically help their coachees think through difficult situations rather than solving problems for them. Coaching skills include skillful questioning, active listening, and giving feedback.
As a rider, I am much (much!) less knowledgeable than my trainers. Their skillful coaching involves some teaching, and some confidence-building. When teaching me a new skill, they always explain the “why;” for example, why using certain aides will help me communicate better with my horse, or how my posture influences his ability to respond to my aides. My trainers also often prompt me to reflect on our work by asking open-ended questions like “how did that feel?” and “what did you notice.” Those open-ended questions help me articulate what I have learned and cement it in my brain and in my body.
Leader as Champion
Leaders who act as champions for their colleagues are advocates for them, helping them secure the right resources, assignments, and opportunities. To be a champion for someone involves investing time, energy, and resources in their success. At work, being a champion for a colleague can involve giving them the benefit of your internal network, introducing them to other mentors or sponsors, even guiding them through a promotion process. Being a champion for someone has a direct impact on their confidence, an important concept in sports psychology. Self-confidence has a direct impact on performance. When a leader acts as a champion for another person, they are, in effect, persuading them that they are competent and successful enough to warrant a mentor or sponsor-type relationship.
My trainers are incredible champions for me and for my horse. They go above and beyond to make sure I have the right mindset going into a lesson. They give me opportunities to build on my success from prior lessons and feel like I am consistently progressing. They support my physical development as well as my ability to reset after a difficult lesson.
The Emotionally Intelligent Leader
Emotional intelligence is perhaps one of the most frequently discussed leadership skills. Emotionally intelligent leaders have both the inner strength and emotional resources to weather difficult situations. They can create a climate in which others are motivated to excel. Emotional intelligence requires self-awareness, control, and the ability to influence others in a positive way. Emotionally intelligent leaders are able to act as catalysts for new ideas and change. Working with horses offers an incredible opportunity to hone our emotional intelligence. Horses sense the slightest change in our emotional state and require us to take charge of and control our emotions before these horses will let us “take the reins.” Similarly, emotionally intelligent leaders recognize their impact on others and use their leadership position to foster achievement, excellence, initiative, and even optimism in others.
